yogyakarta

New Year's Eve
Fire in a nearby hotel
Watching at banci Malioboro curiously
Blurred pictures

Laughing faces
Throwing sandals into the room
For no reason at all
Her face, her smile

Long road home
Puffing last ever cigs at the back row
Knowing all would be gone once the bus stopped
Decisions to make, dreams to bury

Not a fairy tale
Nor a well-structured make believe
Just a memory to keep
When time is closing in

stumble towards each day

The past month was like a whirlwind to me. It came and went quickly, and I hardly remembered what I did then.

I was swamped with works, and was able to get out of it black and blue.

During that time, some things also became clearer to me. Things that I wouldn't ever consider previously, but now I could make a decision about them instantly.

All things that were dear to me were just swept aside. Whenever I had a bit of time to breathe, I just wanted to make use of it for myself. I needed that to stay sane and sober.

I was at the lowest points of my life most of the time, and everything was always looking grey and blurred to me. Even watching United also felt distant now.

Maybe I was just tired of the pettiness of life and everything about it.